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Where I relax and just type what crosses my mind

by John on April 24th, 2012
  • I’ve managed at least one visit to the same gym for the past 21 weeks. I think this deserves some kind of special award.
  • I’m trying to cut back on caffeine. I’m failing miserably.
  • I, however, have cut way back on alcohol intake . . . but I worry that the primary reason for this is to lessen my tolerance.
  • Also, I’m out of red wine at my house, but I’ve been too lazy to buy another box bottle. So I’ve been drinking white.
  • I don’t really like white wine, so I haven’t been drinking very much of it.
  • I fear my kids have learned that they’re cute, and when they smile, they can often get whatever they might want from me.
  • I always knew that I’d be able to mold the likes & dislikes of my children. What I did not anticipate was having a son who will beg to watch Star Wars, episode after episode of Doctor Who, The Princess Bride, Labyrinth, and Doctor Horrible’s Singalong Blog.
  • Actually, the most requested DVD might be The Goonies but I might admit that there are some themes that might be best served if we wait until he’s, like 4, or something.
  • I’m going camping with a bunch of friends & Tweeps1 in June and that makes me shiver…. with anticipation2.
  • I’ve lost enough weight that I had to order a new tuxedo — the one I had was simply falling off of me. Of course, I ordered it on eBay (for a steal) so I couldn’t try it on, and it appears that I need to lose just a little more weight fat before it fits me right.
  • I only have one committed long race – the Virginia Wine Country Half Marathon . . . it feels very odd to not have three or four endurance events lined up. But, with the kids and entrance fees and enjoying the feeling of sitting on my couch, it’s probably for the best.
  • While, because I don’t have a lot of races lined up, I haven’t been running quite as much as I used to, my times are getting markedly better — I credit the weight lifting I’m doing (see point one).
  • I read 50 Shades of Grey and will have a full review posted soon (likely on another site). Let me just say, what a crock of horrible writing. You know, it’s funny – I enjoy campy more than most anyone I know . . . but you have to own the camp. Realize that “this is over the top, and cheesy, and we didn’t want to put the effort in to make this good . . . so we’re just having fun with it.” 50 Shades – well, it was just bad. I can forgive plot holes – heck, I loved Bel Canto and there were holes in that plot that you could have flown the 747 carrying the space shuttle through, but it had truly remarkable & rememberable characters. There were two main characters in 50 Shades, and I wanted to smack both of them. At the end of the book, the only character I felt any sort of connection to was Taylor, the manservant, and that’s just because he seemed to be a ninja.
  • I’ve gotten really, really good at making really, really bad-for-me foods. I believe I can go toe-to-toe against most anyone in cook-offs for the following:
    • Wings
    • Jalapeno Poppers
    • Mashed Potatoes
    • Pizza
    • Macaroni & Cheese (I deep fry the leftovers)
  • I think it’s about time that I get more serious about writing my musical.
  • To get the bad taste of 50 Shades out of my mouth, I started listening to the audiobook of The Stand. Wouldn’t you know that, within minutes, I had a major sneeze infestation.

    Also, while I know we’re well beyond the statute of limitations on giving anything within The Stand away, um, can we say that the survivors of Captain Trips have The Shining?

  • All work and no play makes John a dull boy.

1 I have no idea when a tweep actually becomes a friend . . . but there is a moment. And, it’s not when meeting in real life.
2 That movie isn’t really appropriate for toddlers, either. It’s best to wait until, what, six, before introducing a child to Dr. Frank N Furter?
  1. I love The Stand and The Princess Bride and refuse to read 50 Shades but I will eat jalapeno poppers.


    • My obsession with jalapeno poppers is not healthy . . . it started as a “the kids aren’t going to eat what I make, anyway, so I’m just cooking for myself,” and it got out of control. Now, the kids eye my skeptically, and will even try the poppers.

      My review of 50 Shades will go live today . . . it’s really not worth the time to read it. Basically, I think its popularity is because there is a whole set of readers who did not know that there is erotica out there, so they gobbled up what hit the mainstream, even if it’s not particularly good.

  2. We drink out of boxes around here, too.

    And I am so with you on 50 Shades. What utter crap. I kept reading (by the second and third books I skipped all the s-e-x, or skimmed, b/c it was all the same), thinking there must be a reason people were so crazy about these books. Nope, no reason. I hated the characters, too, and agree Taylor had the only redeeming qualities. Still really can’t believe I wasted time on those stupid books!

    • Oh, that disappoints me about the next two books, but doesn’t surprise me. I had heard a rumor that the next books actually do contain some character development, and that the sex gets better.

      I actually felt that the sex scenes in the first book were some of the redeeming quality — she overused words to the point of distraction, and had some continuity issues, but, overall, I felt it was a half-decent portrayal of sex for someone new.

      But, really, a 21 year old woman who had never had sex and had never even thought to masturbate? In today’s society? After graduating college? Yeah, I don’t see how that can happen.

      As I said in my review, I think the reason people were so into the books is because there is a huge population who never knew erotica existed, so they gobbled up the first mainstream offering . . . it just happened to be crap.

  3. It’s been forever since I commented here and I’m so sorry! I’m not sure you saw my news on the Interwebs, but my house FINALLY sold and we’re officially moving to Seattle. (Yay!) My baby will soon have cousins to play with and a yard to play in! Anyhow, that’s why I’ve been MIA from comments and my blogs. I haven’t blogged in over a week. Ugh.

    OK, enough about me, let’s talk about you and your awesomeness. I may not have commented, but I’ve been reading of yours as soon as it shows up in my inbox. I admire that you tried to cut caffeine, but secretly like that you failed. I know, I’m a terrible friend. But if you aren’t a caffeine junky, I don’t know how we’d remain friends. No, I’m not joking. Wait, if you made me some deep fried mac and cheese, I’d totally be your bff again. And maybe even your tweet. Probably. 🙂

    • Yeah, I’ve been a horrible blog reader lately . . . well, I’ve been doing plenty of reading, but very little commenting . . . stupid schedule (I actually have a blog post about that, if I ever get the time to write it).

      I try to kick the caffeine every few years, and I usually make some progress, even if I fail. But, this time, I’ve actually been drinking more coffee. So, it’s like a fail times two.

  4. The Stand is one of my fave books of all time. Also? It freaked me the freak out because the first time i read it, it was my first King book. I was in college living alone most of the time because my roommate was always either in class or gone home (she was lame).

    Also? Thank you for solving the “should I jump on the ole bandwagon and read 50 Shades of Gray” question for me. I will NOT read it.

    • My review just went live on Blogging Dangerously, and yeah, I think you’re safe skipping it . . . the only reason to read it would be to see why everyone else is reading it.

      As a wannabe author, though, it’s difficult to not read.

      Did you know that I once bought Stephen King a beer?

  5. I am eagerly awaiting “John tells 50 Shades like it is.” No lie. I don’t want to bother reading them, but I am curious what smart people who appreciate a little smut think.

    And there certainly is a point when Tweeps become friends. And it certainly has nothing to do with real life meeting, though THAT? Will be epic.

    • You know, there is a very real possibility that work will have me in Boston sometime within the next few months . . . I’m thinking of one of the more epic tweetups of all time.

  6. Dr. Horrible YEAH!!!!

    I too cannot like a book if I don’t like the characters. I don’t know how anyone can write a whole book with only jerkish people in it.

    Do you have a recipe for those poppers??

    • You know, I’ve live-tweeted the popper recipes a couple of times — the first, when I deep fried them, the second when I wrapped them in bacon & grilled them, and the third when I basically turned them into spicy cheese sticks.

      Having had several passes, I think I’ve come up with a process that’s best (wrapped in bacon & baked), so I’ll blog that recipe very very soon.

  7. Good Lord, deep friend Mac & Cheese?

    I’ve been such a lazy bastard about going to the gym…

    • The Deep Fried mac & cheese is Alton Brown’s fault. He said that it’s the best way to enjoy mac & cheese leftovers . . . and I truly agree. If you watch the episode of good eats, you’ll see how he does it (I change things around from his version . . . but that’s because I crumble Cheez-It crackers for my breading)

  8. As you lower your tolerance for alcohol, I should consider what alcohol may be doing to my tolerance for books. I loved 50 Shades, I was mediocre on #2 and have decided not read #3. I do think deep fried macaroni and cheese would be just as satisfying!

    • Knowing you loved the first book, would you consider yourself an erotica reader? My current hypothesis is that people who were generally unfamiliar with erotica are the ones who most enjoyed 50 Shades

  9. benzeknees permalink

    Love, love, love The Stand, have probably read it 4 times at least. Haven’t read 50 Shades of Grey & after all the terrible reviews here I guess I won’t. Thanks for the heads up!

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